I think that there is another realm beyond life, where all of the lost happiness and time can be redeemed.

Happiness to me is fools gold. Real gold is in another realm. intuition tells me this, and it also tells me that true happiness must come from myself, not the fake happiness that is forced upon me by society; because when I'm forced to, it's not happiness to act and feel fine. let's say that happiness is light. The dying sun illuminates too much. It's hard to see what's beyond, but when you tilt the light I realize that for thousands of nights, I've been a restless soul, digging up fools gold. It took a thousand nights, beyond my own, to find that it was all fools gold. To me, light is shining from the inside of an enclosure. The enclosure is an analogy for life in this world, and everything in this world. The light penetrates beyond, and outside of the enclosure. light is leaking beyond our own realm and into another. wasted time leaks out into a realm beyond our own. I feel trapped, with time and light escaping me, and leaving behind an emptiness that overwhelms me. Everyone else thinks it's fine, because they see an illusion, that there is real light everywhere. For me, happiness and therefore life, is "real" but not in the sense that it makes up for my despair, my dreadful psychological state. Happiness and emotion is something that when I try to grasp, is always fleeting me. But why? Because my intuition tells me about a negative future for me. Once again, sorry for pessimism, but I'm simply reflecting, if you know what I mean. It's as though emotion or happiness is something that I no longer understand or comprehend. It's as though I'm not alive anymore. From now on, life in this world is a placebo, not the real deal. And I'm starting to realize that, so I'm in despair. I strongly think that there is another realm beyond life, where all of the lost happiness and time can be redeemed. It is where my mind is at ease and I have relief. This realization is based off of my intuition that there is an understanding of reality beyond this world. I strongly think that you should respond by social media! What do you think about this, my Facebook friends?

Maciek again Once Again, I don't know what to think about...what?

Maciek here. Here's what's really going on, is that I try to convince myself that psychological pain is actually a fine feeling, can you actually convince someone that an ugly painting looks fine? Well, if we use this as an analogy, then everyone is trying to convince me that a painting looks fine, but to me is ugly. And in this case, that painting looks great to everyone, and I'm left with a different perception of the world that everyone else has. The painting is supposed to be an analogy to psychological pain of mine.
Everyone thinks and perceives (that I'm feeling fine), but to me, it's not fine. goodness sake, life is so messed up for me psychologically. I wish I could get responses, at least on social media. My past depression was merely an illusion, because people convinced me that I was depressed. Once again, I don't know what to say, because I fail to explain the truth. The best that can happen in my life is that my life will slowly and gradually improve, but never be totally as was meant to be. And happiness that is lacking at the end will have to exist only in my hope which is not enough to make up for s****
and this writing might cause people to convince me that I'm not sane; if that's what you want me to be, to be crazy, to portray me as mentally unstable, then I can't do that, because that's not how it is; think back to the analogy that I used earlier. Once you, and readers, start to recognize all of this and think exactly as I'm thinking, then everything will start to become a bit better. So hop on Social media and tell me about it!

Maciek again. My life feels displaced by an emptiness, but sorry for being pessimistic

I feel spoiled; but not for all of the stuff that I have, or all of the happiness in my life. I feel spoiled because of time passing by, and it's unpleasant. I wish I could be backwards in time by at least a few months. I miss winter. I feel like someone who's eaten too much chocolate before dinner. This is an analogy; chocolate was the past, and now spring is dinner, and I am too spoiled to enjoy the future because the past went by not how it was supposed to. I didn't enjoy winter, but I don't have seasonal disorder. In fact, I actually might have gotten this analogy written backwards! I don't mean to be pessimistic on purpose, but the reality is that I won't be happy in the future, such as during the spring or summer, because I feel like I didn't fulfill everything that I wanted to do in the winter. To tell about it another way, it's as if time is always oncoming, but I'm stuck in the past, and there's a hole, an emptiness, that's formed, and that emptiness is the past, and it keeps getting more empty, no matter what I do in the future, whether I get a job, a girlfriend, or find more happiness. It haunts me.
You know how it is when you're working to get something accomplished? Whatever you get done, you are satisfied because you have done everything that you wanted to do, you've accomplished everything, and for me the only life is getting everything done perfectly. I want life to go by in a certain order, and fulfill my desires by the way. I feel as if the world in which I live in is now displaced, because now time is displaced by this emptiness that is forming and getting larger. I will get a job eventually, and maybe I will fulfill all of my past desires. But there is now the realization the lost time cannot be redeemed in our own lifetime; there has to be another realm in which we reside, in which we can live again. and if I knew that such another realm existed for a fact, then I would have peace of mind. Now I'm just someone who is wishing that all days would pass us by. I believe that we don't get just one chance at life. I think that anything in my life that will make me happy will simply be an illusion, because I'll always have this despair in me that I'll hold inside me, and here's another analogy to explain why I've lost all hope. so when someone has anger inside of them, they might either be passive or aggressive. If they're passive, then they might eventually go all out in anger and the situation might turn dangerous. I'm forced to be passive in my despair, and it's all because of the fact that society wants me to always be fine in terms of my mood. optimism is not necessarily an illusion, but for me it is because I'm being overwhelmed by everything. I don't know what to say. I'm overwhelmed by what I fail to explain. It seems as if I've gone too far in feeling negative.

the unexplained

Maciek here. My problems that I got in me mind will probably always be left... unexplained; I'm losing hope trying to explain what is wrong with this world. I have my own philosophy, and it is that life on Earth cannot be the end all because well, it's just too complicated. My life is therefore complicated, and what I realize about the world by my mind cannot be explained to people. So for goodness sake, my mind was once at ease and the life of mine while wandering this compelling world was once organized and now that my life is changing, I meet up with the realization that time will not go back or stop for me. Oh, how much I am in despair. Deep inside, I realize but am unable to explain the truth that I have discovered. Attitudes won't change, and I'm left with nothing but an empty space in my head. An empty space, which is actually knowledge that I have that I can't explain. Goodness sake, please let me get a job, a girlfriend, etc. And then nothing gets better. But even with  all of the commodities of the world, I will still not feel better, for life of mine has diverged, and time cannot be purchased. Sorry if it seems like pessimism, but this isn't about pessimism. It's about truth
And don't tell me about depression because I'm not depressed, I'm in despair. I've gone beyond depression and into something even worse in which I am in a state where I just don't want anything, I don't desire anything anymore because it won't give me peace of mind. I don't know what else to say. If you can, leave a comment or something. I can't think of an analogy of the problem I'm describing, unless it's an analogy that will turn me into a schizo or make me seem mentally unstable

Why?

why does it seem like I'm displaced in this world? I'm mentally sane but I don't feel like myself even when people comfort me or when everything is fine. It's like there's another realm out there and I'm displaced from it. But I'm mentally sane so it can't be that I'm schizo. If you help me or lend me support, hope doesn't exist anymore. I don't like living with the realization that I'm displaced from what was and was meant to be. At least a total transformation of the world is what I want but can't do that much as to repair this world. I'm repelled by the world for some reason. It's like something's telling me, "this is a world which poses a threat to me" and I just don't feel pleasant no more. It's as if Earth is not home, in the sense that there's something seriously unnerving about it all and I don't want to be selfish here and say "I" all of the time but it hurts in a psychological sense and it's been too much for me as it's caused me despair and I have no peace of mind in life anymore. For goodness sake, the world will never return to normal because all the world wants is change

Where Does Lost Time Go?

I've had wasted time in my life. Wasted, but against my own will. For example, I've been taken to appointments which are pointless. Otherwise I would've thought of something else to do, it just takes patience. My question is, if we can just waste time in life and it's still a life that's just fine, then where does that empty time go? We can't, or I can't, accept living with holes in my life. I suppose that lost time is not a part of life but it is because I've wasted it before but not by my own fault. Over a single day, I've wasted 6 hours against my own will, doing practically nothing. So what?! I'll just live 6 hours longer? No, that's illogical. There has to be another realm in which we can make up lost time in this world. I want to go to another realm which I don't know exists but I think strongly that it does, where I can live all over again. But then again, I'll be labeled as a schizo. But there can't just be nothing after life ends some day. I can't have lived a life that I deem as unacceptable and it goes by "just fine", as everybody else considers it. Time is like material, and when it starts getting wasted, a hole forms and it takes away life when I don't even know about it. Man, when will all days just pass by?! I'm tired and have had too much. Let me tell you something; I don't like being in this world, and I don't like my life. There are things such as getting a job, getting a girlfriend, getting money, fulfilling desires, etc. that seem like they would make up for what I miss in life. But what I miss in life cannot be redeemed. Why? Because I basically "set out" to live a life perfectly and wanted to do things in order at certain times, and time has already passed. I can't get over it no matter what, because well, let me describe it this wales time forms a hole into which the rest of my life gets sucked in. It's just like a vacuum that's constantly turned on but nobody notices it because we just keep living our lives "just fine". Eventually, all of the time of my life is gone into this vacuum. Though it's not a statement that's as literal as you may think, it is literal in a psychological state. At the end of all days, all of my ambition will be totally gone and so will hope. I need support and help, but realize that once that happens, hope is anything but left. We need to believe that the life we live is not the only chance we get, and that Earth is not the only realm in which we reside. I'm not a schizo, and I'm not simply talking what I feel or what my thoughts are; instead I'm talking facts about life

When do all days finally end?

When do all days finally end? Please don't messenger me telling me you're worried because  I'm sure many are. But they don't understand. I feel like I'm in a world where it's a constant, unpleasant atmosphere. I don't feel at home in this world. I'm not suggesting I go to another world because only those whodie can do that. But how can I keep living in a world that every place I am, I have the sense that I'm displaced from some other realm which is more pleasant, more so than my own home. This realm has to exist somewhere, my life has gone too far and I miss a place which I don't even know exists

When does war start?

When does the world come out of it's ugly shell and somebody please start a war so nations will be engaged. I'm done. The nuclear codes must be broken and annihilation must reign. Korea, Iraq, Iran, Japan, Russia, China, Israel. All on deck! We about to be in the midst of a revival and the world will be changed for good. Please tell me, dear reader, when does the first battle begin? The world is too restful and I'm afraid of living here.

Watch this and stay tuned

Maciek here. FIRST~ this youtube girl at the bottom is who I want to rave with! I'll ends? Yea I'll end the post; okay. This isn'the end, or as I may call it "restart needs new computer". Ahh, yes... my photography plans aren't working out because my objective was to set up a study for researching ice crystals that magically float gently down and arrive at their destination, under a camera and microscope. Well then as I mentioned, my dear friends, the project is 6 months delayed, so now those artful masterpieces (I haven't created any) are now at total risk of failure due to the presence of f* March. March is a wave and it's turning out ice pellets. I miss fall, when snow was already starting to form but now any snow gets wisped away by the wind and I can't take a good pic of those great patterns. We'll have to get together soon and think about plan b.  This looks like a great person to talk to! So anyhow you get the deal-right? okay so as you know enough talk  means enough yada

Doing Something Incredible Soon

Hi everyone! I'm back! Maciek Mierzwinski here, and I'm going to be doing something incredible next week. I am working on an amazing photography project. I have ordered all of the components (4 in all) and am awaiting my new camera which comes in probably in the early morning tomorrow, which is only a few hours aways! I am not going to go into further dedtail right now, because I want it to be a surprise. The surprise comes when I connect all of the orders together and will take a photo of the setup; you will surely be amazed. Later, after all is said and done, I will use Photoshop or Photoshop Elements and/or GIMP to create masterpieces of art. So stay tuned for the latest on this project! Have a wonderful week. By the way, this project was delayed by about 6 months but I won't go into further detail as to why because that will give out my secret as to what the project will accomplish. It will enable me to capture compelling images the likes of which the world may have never seen before. A hint; one of my new orders is a laser, which is taking extremely long time to come in. Oh...and did I mention...I will be implementing LEDs?

She's so pretty

Sidenote; I don't know why, but this video showed up under my "recommended for you" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxtQ15nA7oA; she looks amazing with her haircut now that's what I call style!

Why don't I feel at home? I feel unpleasant

So I don't feel at home, but what exactly does that mean? When someone says this, it may mean that either they're uncomfortable, or that the atmosphere in which they are in is unpleasant, such as when someone's parents are not being nice to them; well, for me though that's not necessarily why. You see, regardless of environment, for some reason wherever I may find myself, I get the feeling of no peace and I feel unpleasant. Again, it's not because (for example) a chair which I sit in is uncomfortable, or my parents are creating an unpleasant environment; I feel unpleasant regardless of such factors. And that's how it is wherever I am, whether in a store or at home. The better saying so that you can better understand, would be the polish phrases "nie czuje sie u szebie" and "nie czuje sie sobom" which (if correctly spelled of course) are closer to what I was trying to let you understand. This world in which we reside, is not the world that is acceptable. It makes me lonely thinking about it but not because I'm alone but because it seems to me as if this world in which we live, is no longer a place for me. You may say, well you must live on because your discomfort will be one day redeemed by happiness. But I don't think that my troubles are worth less than happiness (happiness won't be able to pay off what I feel like. It would just be better to have some peace of mind.

Question for the readers

Are you all from Facebook?  Are you all doing well? Give me a holler once I figure my phone number out then we can discuss. I don't care, I'm not doing well. I got the wrong beliefs engrained into me you know? Tell me how is 5his all supposed to continue when life's only a limited experience for me. Time is turning to literally nothing

Hi again; update about my life

This is about what I feel about life right now. Let's all hope for peace soon.

At peace soon

I currently want to be at peace, which is nonexistent; I personally have the belief that reincarnation exists and that I can be reborn but not to be reborn to this Earth

Stuck in 2016

I'm stuck in November of 2016; if only I could go back in time. Are you all reading this from Facebook? If yes, then give me a holler. I need somebody like a girlfriend. No I don't. I need a job, or I need ambition. No I don't; I've had too much of life why, what did I ever do wrong? At the beginning of everything, I didn't agree to anything and I definitely didn't agree to live a life that to me seems torture. I've been tormented phsychologically me mind is never at ease, I am never well, and worry about what I'm writing doesn't help. You don't understand, my state cannot be redeemed by happiness or anything positive even though we'd like to think so, that things could turn around. Oh well...I had ambitions before and they were so complex that I don't know how life can go on as I wanted it to. I wanted things to happen perfectly and at the perfect times but when you're too late the lost time won't be redeemed because life only has a set amount of time in which ambitions and the like can fit in. Why can't you understand?

I'm not doing well

I have beliefs that don't match others' beliefs. Why do we have to have certain beliefs engrained into ourselves? I mean, like there is only one life. I think that if I've had too much of life than I can be reincarnated; just I don't want to return to this world. I don't feel at home anywhere in this world and don't want any ambitions no more I just want peace, something that people don't understand